| (no subject) |
[Dec. 8th, 2007|02:04 am] |
my life flashed before my eyes several times in new haven today
but i kept telling myself: if youve driven home after two sakebombs, you can sure as hell drive home through an inch of snow and through niggers throwing snowballs. and lock up the brakes. and be terrified.
im desperate for an id, because, well, itd just make life that much better -- but the only relative i could take one from is in law school and he would probably find it inappropriate (plus, we dont really talk) and i cant think of any friends with brothers except jenn, and me = james is a bit of a stretch. hed so be game though.
i have to do more research, because the fake id front isnt going too well.
suggestions? anyone? PLEASE.
ps: weird. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 2nd, 2007|02:11 am] |
i love adding bitches to my shitlist.
fuck with me, or with one of my friends, and youre done.
dont tell me that the bottle is thirty dollars. i know how much it costs.
dont tell me five times, i knew before the first.
its so funny, because people here dont know what happens to them when they cross me.
kcole? ahem. feel the chill, cunt.
and sarah? youll learn,
its cold in motherfucking fairfield. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 22nd, 2007|03:08 pm] |
uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
my week really started off auspiciously. how many days till friday, and, hence, drunkfest shitshow costume dancing? |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 20th, 2007|12:24 am] |
done with people like you :]
i want more people like you ;]
sexxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxual.
lets try this on for size. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 10th, 2007|01:45 am] |
do you, or do you not, want me around?
and do i, or do i not, want to be around?
seriously, what the FUCK. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 9th, 2007|09:09 pm] |
it's so funny how i can be so wrong about people i know so well.
ill worry immensely about losing one, but not the other.
and then i end up losing the other.
the other's moving on. and im acknowledging it, and not entirely unhappy about it, either.
im surprised as to who's sticking around. how funny, how fucking funny.
bye. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 2nd, 2007|01:24 am] |
its not romantic, its really not.
its like ... retarded. i found someone im moderately (if not more so) compatible with, and i insist on being a fucking obnoxious cunt about it. jesus christ, stop me. stop stopstopstopstop
i need help.
i want to be friends, but not if im pulling all the weight
because ive seriously been doing that for too long, and im done with that |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 1st, 2007|02:28 pm] |
i have so many complexes running at once
yea
itd be fun |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 29th, 2007|06:29 pm] |
first friend-related disappointment at school.
ouch, it singed my eyebrows.
and its also a strong first-ish impression,
but i wont deny that i had you pegged. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 27th, 2007|12:21 am] |
i cant believe that its all coming back to me, so suddenly.
its almost painful, and its making me depressed.
but i suppose it hasnt been all that sudden. ive noticed myself regressing incrementally.
my plan was to drink it all away. how naive.
youre a part of me that i could never deny, regardless of whether or not i have romantic feelings. jesus christ, i hate this. i have some serious issues. just please, lets not repeat the cycle. i dont think i could handle it again. jesus jesus jesus christ. i forget where i am, i forget where ive been.
i forget who you are, and i forget what ive been through to get to you.
i kill myself trying to get to you.
ive died too many times
but ill still put myself through it again.
for you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 26th, 2007|02:57 pm] |
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i miss you more than i miss anyone else. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 10th, 2007|11:36 am] |
ive come to a decision:
im going to tear this place apart like only i can. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 9th, 2007|11:55 pm] |
the cycle begins again. how exciting.
lets see if i can do it better this go-round. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 4th, 2007|12:47 am] |
missing everyone and everything
just suffer through the first few days |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 29th, 2007|07:26 pm] |
will i be able to get over my anxiety, jealousy, nostalgia, and general rage?
stay tuned to see if the dam stays sturdy, or if it goes up in a puff of foul-smelling smoke. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 28th, 2007|07:14 pm] |
please dont turn into her.
people youre not friends with sober arent your friends.
try to adjust without the aid of substances.
but im the one with the problem.
i come out looking like a posterchild for moderation. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 24th, 2007|01:09 am] |
can't deal
i taste salt. were they always so salty?
cant do it cant do it
i want to believe the words that i dont believe in
im a mess
i wont look in the mirror |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 23rd, 2007|12:24 am] |
this fucking sucks,
going through it alone. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 18th, 2007|12:57 am] |
the only sound i want to hear is the ringing in my ears.
how did i end up with such shitty friends? |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 17th, 2007|02:12 am] |
there's been shit, there's been shouting, there's been unnecessary drama.
i've hated my friends, i've wanted more than anything to go away from here.
i've been anxious, i've been suffocated, i've been bored. very bored.
im not ready. im not ready.
my stomach is telling me.
im not ready, at all. not now.
i wont be able to take it.
one hundred sixty eight hours and counting.
then the sky, and my digestive tract, will split in half.
one hundred sixty eight
and it all begins. |
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fiftieth's journal